Sunday, July 19, 2015

Out-of-Class #2: Another Example


July 16, 2015
Tuition Hike

The Michigan State University Board of Trustees approved a budget that implements a tuition increase for students for the 2015-2016 school year at their meeting on June 17.

The approved budget calls for a 2.7 percent increase for in-state undergraduate students and applies to both upper and lower-division students.

According to the school’s budget summary, tuition and fees are estimated at $891.1 million based on a rate increase of approximately $12 per credit hour for lower-division undergraduate students and approximately $13.25 per credit hour for upper-division undergraduate students.

HERE WE NEED TO ESTABLISH THAT THIS ISN’T A ONE-TIME THING; THAT IN FACT THIS IS A PART OF AN ONGOING TREND. LATER IN THE STORY THERE ARE THREE GRAFS I’VE HIGHLIGHTED THAT WOULD FIT IN WELL HERE TO ESTABLISH THE TREND BEFORE WE START GETTING TO PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT TUITION INCREASES, PLURAL.

EVEN BETTER, I WOUND CONSIDER RECASTING THE LEDE SEQUENCE HERE TO EMPHASIZE THE LATEST MOVE BEING PART OF A TREND, RATHER THAN AN ISOLATED THING. THE FIRST THREE GRAFS GIVE NO HINT TO THE LARGER TREND AT ALL, AND IT SEEMS TO ME FROM WHAT YOU FOUND IN TERMS OF INTERVIEWS THAT IT’S THE TREND THAT’S THE NEWS MORESO THAN JUST THIS ONE INCREASE NOW.

“These tuition increases are ridiculous,” said Trina Lusk, a parent of three students who attend universities. “Not only are my children going deeply into debt taking out loans to afford college, but so am I.”
HOW MUCH DEBT IS SHE IN? AND HER KIDS? LET’S SHOW PEOPLE THE EXACT PROBLEM SHE FACES.

The tuition increases are causing some parents and students to worry about the debt that they will incur trying to afford higher education.

“By the time I finish undergraduate and graduate school I’ll have to spend the rest of my life and career working to pay off student loans instead of being able to live comfortably,” said Moriah Hill, a senior undergraduate student at MSU.
HOW MUCH HAS HILL BORROWED? HOW MUCH IS HER TUITIONBILL GOING TO BE THIS YEAR? LET’S SHOW THE SPECIFIC PROBLEM SHE FACES

According to Hill, she doesn’t feel like the university board is taking into consideration the families of students who don’t have much money and have to take out loans to afford their education.

George Perles, a member of MSU’s Board of Trustees COMMA HERE says SAID, STED SAYS that that isn’t true.

“We have compassion for students and families and we understand the struggles that they face,” said Perles.

According to Perles, the board doesn’t have much control over the increases in tuition because it is mostly driven by outside forces.
WHAT ARE THOSE FORCES? BE SPECIFIC. AND IS THERE DATA TO SUPPORT WHATEVER THE FORCES ARE?
“Everybody is trying to get the tuition as low as we can but funding is going down and expenses are going up,” said Perles.

Antoinette Flores, a policy analyst and expert in postsecondary education for the Center for American Progress COMMA HERE agrees with Perles.

“We and others have found that the leading driver to tuition increases are decreases in state investment,” said Flores. “Schools are somewhat limited in what they can do in the face of declining state funding.” GOOD NEUTRAL EXPERT HERE

IS THERE NATIONAL DATA SHE CAN OFFER THAT SHOWS THE NATIONAL TRENDS?
Another reason that the Board of Trustees is giving to justify the increases is that it will go toward financial aid.

“Everything is going up. Faculty’s salaries are being raised and so is financial aid,” said Perles.
HOW MUCH? SHOW US THE EXACT DOLLARS IN PLAY HERE.
The way that the financial aid is being used can be important in determining whether it is a just cause in helping all students afford college or not, according to Flores.

“If it is intended to help the neediest students and increase access, it should be need-based aid. But many schools say they are providing more financial aid and could mean in the form of merit aid that largely helps attract wealthier students who then can pay more tuition and help shore up lost funding,” said Flores.
*** WE NEED TO MOVE UP THE NEXT THREE GRAFS HERE TO THE SPOT MENTIONED EARLIER TO ESTABLISH THE TREND BEFORE WE GET INTO RESPONSES AND SUCH ***
The tuition hike at MSU set for the 2015-2016 school year is not a single occurrence. The school has faced tuition increases consistently for the past few years.

In 2011, the tuition at MSU was $406.75 per credit hour for in-state undergraduate students and has continued to rise every year, lastly reaching $452 per credit hour in 2015, according to the school’s history of tuition.

According to the College Board, between 2013-2014 and 2014-2015, average published tuition fee prices increased by 2.9 percent nationally for in-state students in the public four-year college.

*** WE NEED TO MOVE UP THE PREVIOUS THREE GRAFS HERE TO THE SPOT MENTIONED EARLIER TO ESTABLISH THE TREND BEFORE WE GET INTO RESPONSES AND SUCH ***


“If tuition continues to rise, it will steer young adults away from college rather than encouraging them to attend because they won’t be able to afford it,” said Lusk.

According to Hill, she feels the same way and is doubting if continuing her education is worth the debt that it will put her in.

“I already have so many loans and I’m still an undergraduate student,” said Hill. “I can’t imagine how I am going to afford graduate school if the tuition rates continue to go up.”

Flores offers her advice to college students on what they can do if they don’t agree with the tuition increases.

“As students, you should be talking to your legislators, pushing this data to officials, and encouraging them to return their investment to public colleges,” said Flores.

Word count: 701












Trina Lusk, parent
12709 Barlow St.
Detroit, MI 48205
313-283-2915

George Perles, MSU Board of Trustees member
6153 W. Longview Drive
East Lansing, MI 48823
517-525-3794

Moriah Hill, MSU undergraduate senior
248-277-1517

Antoinette Flores, policy analyst, postsecondary education
Center for American Progress
202-481-8233


ASSIGNMENT GRADE: (REDACTED)
INSTRUCTOR COMMENTS: VERY NICE RANGE OF INTERVIEWS HERE. WE’RE TWO STEPS AWAY FROM REALLY MAKING THIS STORY POWERFUL: FIRST, GETTING MORE SPECIFICS WHEN PEOPLE SAY THEY’RE IN DEBT, STATE AID IS GOING DOWN, ETC. SHOW ME THE EXACT NUMBERS SO THE READER CAN SEE HOW BIG A BURDEN IT REALLY IS, AS OPPOSED TO JUST SAYING IT’S A BURDEN.  SHOW ME THE PROOF FOR THOSE STATEMENTS. PLUS, I THINK WE CAN REFINE THE LEDE SEQUENCXE TO MORE DIRECTLY GO INTO THE TREND AS OPPOSED TO FOCUSING JUST ON THE LATEST INCREASE, AND THEN GETTING INTO THE TREND. THE TREND IS THE STORY, BASED ON YOUR INTERVIEWS; LET’S CUT THROUGH THINGS AND GET TO WHAT IS MOST INTERESTING/RELEVANT/USEFUL HERE.

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