(name redacted)
Housing
October 12, 2014
OOC #1
“Welcome
to Michigan State University! This letter contains important information
related to moving into your campus housing at MSU.”
These
are the first two lines every incoming freshman that will be living on campus at
MSU WILL read when opening their
room assignment.
After
being accepted and attending their Academic Orientation Program, freshmen still
have to wait for their room assignment. Suspicion and anxiety is usually
boiling at this point, however, the actual room address that follows those two
lines will no longer be a surprise for freshmen next fall.
Beginning with the
fall semester of 2015, all incoming freshmen will be able to choose where they
live, according to the Housing Assignments Office.
HOW WILL THE PICKING SYSTEM WORK? HOW MANY
FRESHMEN WILL IT AFFECT? LET’S NOT JUST SAY THEY’LL BE ABLE TO PICK; LET’S
DETAIL HOW THEY WILL DO SO
Mary Lou
Heberlein, manager at the Housing Assignments Office, said in an email that
freshman students were previously assigned to halls based on availability.
“Returning
students have the option of retaining their own room or moving to another hall
for the upcoming year,” Heberlein said. “Space is then reserved for incoming
freshmen. There are several living learning programs in the halls which dictate
where a freshmen live if they are accepted to any of them.”
Living-learning
programs allow students who share similar academic interests, or an interest in
a multicultural living experience, to live together in designated residence
halls or on particular residence hall floors, according to MSU’s admissions
website. WEBSITE IS UPPER CASE, PER AP
STYLE
Heberlein said
that they had no means to make this change until now. WHAT HAS CHANGED TO ALLOW THIS? DON’T JUST TELL ME THEY COULDN’T DO IT;
SHOW ME WHY THEY COULDN’T AND WHY THEY CAN NOW.
ALSO, WE NEVER EXPLICITLY EXPRESS WHY THIS
CHANGE IS BEING MADE. WERE THEIR PROBLEMS BEFORE? DID A LOT OF PEOPLE SWITCH
BECAUSE OF THAT? WERE THEIR A LOT OF COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE OLD SYSTEM? WE NEED
TO EXPLAIN HERE.
“We always hope
that the students will have the best housing experience possible,” Heberlein
said. “I think there will be satisfaction that they were able to participate in
the process and pick what they want most. WE’RE
MISSING A CLOSED QUOTE MARK HERE
MSU Sophomore SOPHOMORE IS LOWER CASE AS IT IS A GENERAL
AND NOT FORMAL TITLE, PER AP STYLE Julie Stein, who no longer lives on
campus but stayed in Holmes Hall her freshman year, said she was mad that
incoming freshmen would be able to pick and she wasn’t, but that she would pick
the same place.
“Personally, I’m
mad I didn’t get to do it,” Stein said. “I would’ve picked Holmes because I was
in Lyman Briggs.”
Stein said she
thinks incoming freshmen will appreciate the choice.
“People will be
happy,” Stein said. “When you have to trudge all the way across campus because
you ended up somewhere not close to your classes at all, it just makes your
experience at school a lot worst.”
MSU Freshman FRESHMAN IS LOWER CASE AS IT IS A GENERAL AND NOT FORMAL TITLE, PER AP STYLE
James Beckom said he thinks freshmen should be able to pick.
“They should
definitely be able to pick,” Beckom said. “They are paying for it.”
Heberlein said
students will refer to the liveon.msu.edu website to assist them in their
selection.
“Our website WEBSITE IS UPPER CASE, PER AP STYLE will
have a lot of information along with links to all the neighborhoods so they can
see what is available,” Heberlein said. “The Housing Assignments Office will
also be available to answer questions.”
As for the current
freshmen, Heberlein recommends talking to hall staff for any issues or
concerns.
“I would suggest a
conversation with their hall staff to talk out their issues,” Heberlein said.
“There are so many different housing options available that they might want to
go out and tour around – maybe another place would be a better fit.”
HERE WE COULD USE SOME DATA ON HOW MANY PEOPLE MAKE DORM DURING THE
YEAR.
PLUS, WHAT HAPPENS IF TOO MANY PEOPLE ASK FOR ONE DORM? HOW DO THEY
PICK, THEN? AND WHAT HAPPENS TO PEOPLE THEN?
Students Give Advice NO NEED FOR THIS SUB-HEADLINE HERE; DELETE
IT AND MERGE THE STORY HERE
LaBresha Broadnax,
a student who attended MSU and will be returning in the spring, said she has
faith that incoming freshman will choose wisely.
“A lot of people
that are coming in know people here as well, so that should help.” Broadnax
said.
Broadnax said she
lived in Hubbard Hall her freshman year and was pleased with the number of
tutoring aides, computer center, and her RA.
“My overall
experience at Hubbard was pleasant,” Broadnax said. “I actually chose to stay
there again before I moved back home. I hope the incoming students take those
sort of things into consideration.”
MSU Freshman FRESHMAN IS LOWER CASE AS IT IS A GENERAL
AND NOT FORMAL TITLE, PER AP STYLE Natalie Ross, who currently lives in
Hubbard Hall, said she’s pissed ANGRY,
STED PISSED; LET’S NOT USE LANGUAGE THAT MAY DISTRACT READERS FROM A BROAD
ARRAY OF BACKGROUNDS FROM THE STORY AND INSTEAD QUESTION YOUR EDITORIAL
JUDGMENT. Ishe wasn’t able to chose but recommends that future freshman
look into where they choose to stay.
“Really look into
it and especially talk to people who lived there if you can,” Ross said.
MSU
Freshman FRESHMAN IS LOWER CASE AS IT IS
A GENERAL AND NOT FORMAL TITLE, PER AP STYLE Josh Weidenaar said he if he
could have chosen, he would have picked Landon Hall, which has a newly HYPHEN HERE renovated cafeteria. PLUS, WHERE DID HE END UP LIVING?
“I
would choose Landon 3 million times if could,” Weidenaar said.
MSU Senior SENIOR IS LOWER CASE AS IT IS A GENERAL AND
NOT FORMAL TITLE, PER AP STYLE Chanita Wymes said she lived in Hubbard her
freshman year and enjoyed her time there. She said she thinks it’s good that
freshman will be able to pick.
“Don’t
pick your bestfriend BEST FRIEND IS TWO
WORDS for a roommate and stay anywhere,” Wymes said. “I think you could
stay anywhere on campus and still have fun.”
WHY DON’T WE TALK TO ANY INCOMING FRESHMEN, SINCE THEY’RE THE ONES WHO
WILL HAVE FIRST CRACK AT THIS? WE CAN NEVER LEAVE OUT PEOPLE WHO WILL BE MOST
AFFECTED BY WHATEVER WE’RE WRITING ABOUT
Word Count: 755
Sources:
Mary Lou Heberlein – heberlei@rhs.msu.edu, 517-884-5483
Julie Stein – steinju1@msu.edu, 630-962-4791
James Beckom – beckomja@msu.edu, 313-265-0295
LaBresha Broadnax – broadna5@msu.edu, 313-728-0446
Natalie Ross – rossnat4@msu.edu, 517-899-9727
Josh Weidenaar – weidena1@msu.edu, 517-242-6118
Chanita Wymes – wymescha@msu.edu,
ASSIGNMENT GRADE: (redacted)
INSTRUCTOR COMMENTS: VERY NICE OVERALL JOB, BUT WHAT WE LACK ARE
EXPLANATIONS AS TO WHY THEY’RE DOING WHAT THEY’RE DOING, AND DETAILS (STATS,
ETC.) TO SUPPORT THAT. WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED TO ASK FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS TO OUR
INITIAL QUESTIONS; WE NEED TO ASK SOURCES, “HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?” AND “BUT WHY?”
AFTER THEY GIVE US ANSWERS. ASKING THOSE QUESTIONS AND GETTING THOSE ANSWERS
COULD RESULT IN A BETTER GRADE WITH THE OPTIONAL REWRITE.
No comments:
Post a Comment